Out of the mouths of babes

When someone approaches you and asks what you think about a subject do you answer with something off the wall or do you think about what the person has asked you and answer with an intelligent reply?  Do you respond to a query with an answer to the dilemma or do you just mouth some niceties and go on about your way?  What if that person were your child?  Or someone else's child...  Perhaps what they're asking seems unimportant or trivial to an adult who has disconnected with how is was to be at that age or stage...

I write about this today because of a headline that caught the eye of a friend on social media who "shared" it with those of us on his "list".  The story of how an attendant on a school bus was assaulted by some middle school students.  There were a few comments in relation to my friend's shared headline that I'm sure were sincere but I realized as I read these things how estranged each of us has become from the other.  How our society is crumbling in the wake of a generation of human beings that haven't had the luxury of growing up where you can rely on others being there when it counts.  There are some people like that around - but not nearly enough.

The most important duty we have as humans is to make sure the following generations will be able to survive what comes.  It is important not to forget that these things are not exclusive to academic and financial achievement, but also include how to treat other human beings.  Without being able to respect one another we will be lost forever to our own misguided leanings.  We must be relentless in showing the way and teaching others with our own actions is the most efficient means of doing so.

Stop and think before you react.  We can effect the way the world evolves in tiny ways that become a much larger movement.  Life can be a better place while we're here.  Do your part.

When death visits

I haven't written in a long time.  It seems that everything I wanted to say had been said many times over in several different languages and forms so I stayed quiet.  This, however, is very personal and something that I need to write down without edit while it's still kinda raw.

I grew up not knowing my real family as I was adopted.  I was nearly of legal age before I knew that the people who raised me were, in fact, actual relatives who despised my mother and therefore kept us apart as much as possible.

So as a young adult I found I had two half-sisters and two half-brothers.  We all shared the same mother who was the neice of those who raised me.  Robert was about 18 months older (and the eldest).  I was the next in line.  Then there was Jeffrey who is about 3 yrs my junior.  Then Tina and Tammy.  This post is dedicated to Tina, who passed away today after a long illness.  She was in her early 40's.

I am ashamed that I don't know exactly how old, but assimilating a whole new family into your life after you're grown is a challenge.  I was grateful to hear that there were people who wanted to be a part of my life and wanted very much to be part of theirs.

So as young adults, my sister Tina and I partied, laughed, cried and shared everything we could think of.  She was a beautiful, vibrant woman whom I adored with all my heart.

I had to abandon all those good times when in the late 90's I admitted alcoholism and vowed to stay away from all those situations where alcohol was present and would be tempting.  After that, I only saw her once or twice a year at family gatherings during the holidays.  We grew apart again over mundane issues and didn't speak for years.

About two years ago I learned that she was gravely ill with what was thought to be cancer.  I never really got the whole story as I'm not in the "loop" for family affairs.  After all, I was absent for so many years I guess it was easy to forget I'm still around.

I've been told that I'm the "strong one" and can take care of myself - which may very well be true.  I still need comfort and understanding from family who wanted so much to be there but faded after the initial thrill was gone.

Anyway - I love my sister and I missed her everyday even before she passed.  I was told that I shouldn't call her anymore because I upset her, so I didn't...even when I felt I really needed to talk to her.  Now I no longer have the option and I'm overwhelmed at that prospect.

I will hold you in my heart always, Tina Michelle Vieth.  May you rest in peace.